"Adoring Mail from my Beloved Fans" aka "Hate Mail, Back-Handed Compliments and Other Email I Have Received"

Here's an email I got from someone named Shannon:

Usually I get disgusted with annoying sites like this, but I must admit that this site is hilarious. I like that email about Preparation H and the Kangaroo one. Can hemmoroids really run in someone's family?
lol
~Shannon~

I like this email, mainly because even though Shannon used the words "disgusted" and "annoying" within the first six words, she managed to end up being reluctantly complimentary.
Not everyone can use the words "disgusted" and "annoying" and still manage to be somewhat flattering.
Way to go, Shannon!

Well Shannon, I'm usually sickened by repulsive emails like yours, but your email was very nice. By the way, I don't know if her misspelling of the word "hemorrhoids" was intentional or not.

Anyway, all this has inspired me to create a section I like to call "Shannon Writes to Famous People" :

Dear Oprah Winfrey,
While I am usually filled with great hatred and contempt for shows such as yours, I must admit your show is quite good.
lol
~Shannon~

Dear Nelson Mandela,
Usually the thought of someone who is an advocate for a social and human rights makes me want to vomit.
But I have to say, you sir, have really impressed me with your courage and conviction.
lol
~Shannon~

Dear Dalai Lama,
Okay, Listen up. Let me start off by saying that normally I am filled with utter rage and disgust for Buddhist Holy Men such as yourself.
Just the thought of a Buddhist's belief in tolerance and their focus on the development of personal paths to enlightenment, makes the bile from my stomach rise and crawl up into my mouth. The nausea I feel, when I think of how Buddhism stresses true compassion for others, is well beyond compare. It gives me a truly sick and horrid sensation that starts from my scalp and slowly makes its way down to my toes.
Now, where was I? I forget what I was leading up to... Oh, right, I remember now.
I usually bitterly hate Tibetan Holy Men with the very core of my existence. However, I find you to be quite worthy of respect.
P.S. Can hemmoroids really run in someone's family?
lol
~Shannon~

As a side note I would like to say it was really difficult to find a picture of the Dalai Lama without a smile on his face.